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internetmessiah:

Hello, 911? *twirls phone cord around finger* sooooo how was your day? Did you arrest any bad guys?…No you hang up first! Hello? 911?

colossal-sweat:

walking out of a bathroom with no hand dryers like

image

ben-c:

bonaventure-:

if someone ever calls u a mean name just respond “nah” like how do you even respond to that realistically 

some person: hey asstown 
you: nah 
some person:

i think my favourite part about this post is that out of all the mean names someone could realistically call you, they chose “asstown”


sext:  are you for or against the Oxford comma?